Cosmic Intimacy: Rewriting Sacred Connection After Pain
There’s the kind of intimacy that feels good in the moment…
And then there’s the kind that makes you remember who you are.
Let’s talk about the space between.
If you've ever walked through betrayal, abandonment, or emotional disconnection, especially in romantic or sexual relationships, you may have noticed something odd: the body remembers what the mind tries to forget.
The sacral space, your womb, your hips, your pelvis, your lower belly—is not just about desire. It’s a vault. A keeper of stories. A magnetic center of creation, creativity, and yes, deep vulnerability. Whether you identify as feminine, masculine, or something fluid in between, this part of your body carries memory. Of lovers. Of losses. Of moments where you gave too much or weren’t met in your full light.
This isn’t about being “damaged.” It’s about realizing that energy gets stored where it once flowed. And to truly heal, we don’t just clear the mind, we invite the body to breathe again.
Now let’s poke a sacred bear: the difference between regular sex and sacred sex.
“Regular” sex (for lack of a better word) often seeks relief, something external to feel something internal. It’s physical. Stimulating. Sometimes connected, sometimes not. It can feel amazing… or hollow.
Sacred sex, on the other hand, is an energetic experience. A remembrance. It’s presence. Eye contact. Breath synced. Nervous systems regulating together. No faking. No performance. Just the meeting of two souls in a body-based language of yes, truth, and release. It’s not about frequency or how long it lasts, it’s about depth.
And here's the truth: you don’t need another person to practice sacred intimacy.
You can cultivate it with yourself. Right now.
Yes, even while healing.
Especially while healing.
So what does self-intimacy really look like in the aftershocks of pain?
Not as some “I am enough” mantra slapped over heartbreak... but as a slow, grounded return to your own body. Here’s where it starts:
-
Touch yourself without agenda. That might mean massaging your legs, your belly, or running your fingers gently through your hair just to say: “I’m here.” It doesn’t have to be sexual to be sensual.
-
Warm water. A bath. A long shower. Place your hand on your womb or lower belly under the stream and breathe.
-
Breathe into your hips. Really. Imagine golden breath filling that whole area. If you’ve shut this part of your body down, zero judgment. Just start again. Open, & reclaim.
-
Speak to yourself out loud. Try: I trust you now. I’ll listen. Simple, potent words unlock old stories.
-
Stretch. Even five minutes of intuitive movement, hips swaying to your own rhythm, can move years of frozen emotion.
-
Reclaim what you enjoy. Play your favorite music. Cook what makes your mouth water. Laugh when something’s funny. These things count.
Now, let’s weave in the real plot twist:
Sometimes, after we think we’ve “ascended” or “moved on,” the grief returns.
The pain shows up in new clothes. The triggers come back. We think we failed.
You didn’t fail.
You leveled up.
The spiral path of healing means we revisit things from a higher octave. We feel more. We see deeper. The emotions may look the same, but you are not. You’ve got tools now. You’ve got awareness. You’ve got access to something ancient.
There will come a moment...maybe soon... when someone looks into your eyes and sees all of you. Not just the curated version. The messy. The wild. The awake.
But they will only see what you’ve chosen to see in yourself first.
So breathe into that womb.
Let your spine rise.
Feel the fire and the softness.
And remember:
You were never broken.
You were just storing the instructions for your own return.
🔥🌹💫
